Ah, another election year is upon us. Another election that George Bush, despite a poor track record and sizable complaints even among other Republicans, is probably going to win.
It's not because people want to vote for him and it's not because people don't want to vote for Kerry. It's because they don't want to be associated with the sort of people who see this election as an issue of Bush / Not Bush, because these people are acting like jerks.
Think back about three months ago, when MoveOn.org was in the height of its campaign against George Bush's reelection. Do you remember whose image was juxtaposed with our dumb president? Adolph Hitler. Adolph Hitler was quite possibly the worst madman in history. His manipulation of his country's racist and nationalistic tendencies lead to the invasion of half of Europe and the murder of millions of jews, homosexuals, gypsies and communists. Bush's campaigns aren't anything remotely like Hitler's, neither in scale nor in impetus. Comparing the two is not only ludicrous, it's an embarassing evocation of Godwin's Law.
I know MoveOn.org wasn't responsible for this video. The Democratic Party wasn't responsible for it. And yet, they never distanced themselves from it, either. This is a problem -- unless you make a solid differentiation between radical agenda and the party's real platform, outsiders will assume the two are the same.
Both sides of the coin -- right and left -- are full of idealistic nutjobs who want the world to shut up and be the way they want it to be. What I don't think these folks realize is how negatively their activities reflect on their side. When I hear about abortion opponents killing doctors and attempting to ruin lives, I, as a moderate, find myself siding with the pro-choice people even though I personally don't like abortion. Their arguments seem, well, crazy, and I don't want to be associated with it. Similarly, when I hear about environmental groups setting fire to SUV dealerships (hey assholes: they're insured. they'll just get reimbursed and rebuild and sell Hummers again. all you did was release toxic chemicals into the environment), I find myself wondering why I'm writing this check to the Sierra club.
It is impossible to acheive real change when the most vocal forces on your "side" are making inexplicable claims and calling for impractical solutions. Real change takes time, care and constant vigilance. We're not going to snap our fingers and instantly have world peace, decent jobs, a clean environment and so on. I believe John Kerry knows this, judging from his voting record. The man has changed his mind, damnit. That means a lot. It means he doesn't act like most politicians, voting with his party regardless of the particulars. He looks at the big picture and sometimes votes for things because they'll improve things, not because they'll perfect things. For example, Kerry voted for the No Child Left Behind act, even though he harshly criticizes it. Does that make him a hippocrite? I don't think so. I have a Verizon cell phone and I think it sucks...but they're still better than all of the other cell phone providers in the area.
So, Kerry's alright for a politician. I voted for him in the primaries and was real excited he won. But look at who's supporting him now: a bunch of crazies. Not because he's a sensible politician who does what's best, but because he's Not Bush.
Listen assholes. You are not going to convince anybody new that Bush is a liar, or a killer, or a cheat, or an idiot. Everybody who is going to believe that believes it already. What we need to do now, if we want Kerry to win this thing, is to convince the people who aren't already Bush haters that Kerry is a sound candidate who isn't going to sell America to the special interests, isn't going to tax us into oblivion, isn't going to be "soft" on terrorism and isn't going to pull us out of Iraq and risk ours and that country's safety. The Democrats have a great track record here, they just need to get the word out.
Your big protest of the Republican convention isn't going to do that. Your hacking of websites isn't going to do that. All these headgames and questioning of war records isn't going to do that. We need to stifle our outrage for the next four months and focus on the goal: make Kerry seem approachable and sensible. Make the Democratic party seem like something anybody can join without having to buy in to a laundry list of accusations and conspiracy theories. And turn this into a real "Kerry v. Bush election," instead of "A bunch of crazy liberals against Bush." We don't have to convince people that Bush lied about the war in Iraq, we just have to convince them that he's too reactive a strategist to effectively defend us against so agile a foe as international terrorism. This will attract the people who aren't ready to throw GWB out of the game, but would maybe like to see somebody else pitch the next few innings against those left-handed terrorists.
We can't wait for the debates (which Kerry will surely win, he's an awesome orator, that's what attracted me to him in the primaries). We need to assert our position early, and we need to decide as a unified force to comb our hair, straighten our shirts, polish our birkenstocks and leave the radical attitude at Rockaway Beach. You can't fight stoicism with passion and expect to win -- ain't you motherfuckers ever seen Crossfire?
Have you noticed how much, um, touching our Democratic presidential hopefuls have been doing?
I have. Matt Drudge has.
It's kind of spooky. I am picturing a montage segment set to Herman's Hermits "I'm in to something good." They go to a carnival, Edwards wins Kerry a stuffed bear. Then Kerry is rowing a canoe while Edwards holds a parasol. Edwards bites into a hot dog and the condiments shoot out the other side, and they both laugh. And then they walk into the sunset, arm in arm.
Of course, it may just be the contrast with Bush and Cheney, who look like they could use a little more physical contact in their lives. Bush has those big, lonely, golden retreiver eyes, and Cheney's a fucking gargoyle. I hear he perches on the dome of the capitol building to scare off the more liberal evil spirits.
Anyhow, it's good to see candidates who at least pretend to respect and like each other. You can fake a lot of things in politics, but true friendship is forever.
Okay, ladies and gentlemen. Congress has lost its fucking mind. Amid reports that file sharing has increased CD sales and a generally low opinion of the music industry, they go and approve this shit. Now, getting through committee doesn't mean it'll go anywhere. But even so, we can't let it. Copyright is not theft. It shouldn't be, because it is too easy to accidentally infringe. Right now, it's the copyright holder who is in charge of their work. This bill seeks to put that power in the hands of the federal government.
This is turning a low end civil matter into a felony. It'd be like jailing someone for missing a mortgage payment. And with the current valuation used by the RIAA, a single file is considered at tens of thousands of dollars.
I'm making a deal with you guys. With Webslum 3, I am going to try to find a way encrypt all access logs and user directories. The only people who will ever know what's on your site and what's been downloaded from it is YOU. The feds can subpoena all they like: I can't give them records I don't keep.
Oh, and IM me for access to my major elite 150 gigabyte music server. Email me to join my mixology club (one free CD of rocking music in the mail every month, out of consanguine kindness). Gonna get my rocks off before donning these Sennheisers means prison.
Remember when you were small, and somebody would slight you? It didn't matter if it was with something foolish, like holding a Nintendo remote too long. You flipped out. You screamed. You cried. You would flail your arms irrationally and in doing so often began a fight that would leave you bruised and hated.
If you don't remember this, if you remember your childhood as a period of success and wisdom, maybe you shouldn't read the statistics below.
Cillians killed in Trade Center attacks (includes people onboard planes, inside buildings, and rescue workers):
3018 (source: Associated Press)
Civilians killed in Afghanistan attacks (does not include members of terrorist organizations, Talibam military or "rebels"):
3068-3587 (source: http://pubpages.unh.edu/~mwherold/)
Civilians killed in Iraq attacks:
1930-2377 (source: iraqbodycount.net)
Total civillian deaths in the middle east:
4998-5964
Feel free to disbelieve these numbers. That's exactly the sort of dumbass thing I expect people to do rather than admit that their loyalties are misplaced and their patriotism is marred by the steady deterioration of the things they're most proud of. Our damn monkey brains don't like to be wrong.
I do not support starting wars in other countries for any reason. I do not care that "the best defense is a good offense." This argument can too easily be used to commit atrocities in the name of paranoia -- after all, ANY country could be our enemy. We broke the missile treaty to protect ourselves. Protection should not leave our coastlines, it should not cross our borders, and if that means complete isolation, maybe we'll have to move the manufacture of essentials like tennis shoes, cars and toothbrushes back to american soil. Maybe we'll have to find an energy source that isn't controlled by fundamentalists. Maybe we'll have to sit idly by and let other countries make the same mistakes in the name of progress that we did, including civil wars and oppression. Maybe we should stop acting like the world's bigger brother, so they won't stop seeing us as Big Brother.
(Please see the iraqbodycount.org site for info on what the high and low numbers mean. They're an attempt to eliminate differences due to journalistic propaganda)